8/24/98 Dry Heat in that location is a brick in the middle of my head It imposes a arrant(a) dread The brick changes discolour at unpredictable times sometimes red, sometimes green, and sometimes its etiolated hot and the light comes expose of my eyes and mouth and ass I float The brick appeared I dont know when its so much a part of me I happen it must always shed been This brick, it is present sometimes it is subtle and hard to detect, at others it overwhelms, Stopping all legal opinion and action, taking away the will to live Thoughts can non baby my thinker the brick intercepts them They disappear into a black hole This hole is in the brick, which is in my head I think the brick is made of entice It is so heavy sometimes I fall to my knees sometimes the brick feels bigger than my head though I know it is inside(a) My head wants to explode at these times I scorn the brick I have no selfhood, I do not exist, I am just a meat animal Thoughts of suicide come over ag ain and again. How long in front my body is found? Will I malodor up the place? Should I go out care microphone? Where will I get the morphine? Recently the brick has taken to keeping me home from spirt.

Its weird, Ill be ok until its time for race then the pounding begins and it gets progressively worse until I telephone call in, then sudden relief and a feeling of guilt. I am so fucking broken now, all my paranoiac fantasies came true. Death is the only(prenominal) thing I can think of forcing me to portray my cowardice, thereof making everything more painful. Well there is the down(prenominal) spiral again. What color is the brick then?... ! If you want to get a full essay, shape it on our website:
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